Ridicule is Nothing to Be Scared Of
This mix is about how I wish I were British.
Why It’s Pretentious: I watched a lot of Skins and British indie films in high school. Therefore, I had a very skewed view of what life should be like. Namely, I was confused as to why everyone else didn’t frequently use British slang, wear cardigans, and fork over obscene amounts of cash for 7”s of then-obscure bands on eBay. Anyway, I made this mix for a friend’s birthday. She liked Foals, so she showed promise. It’s actually pretty good, except for when I end it with a random GRIME REMIX.
…But really, how am I supposed to resist a band named after a Street Fighter move?!
Tracklisting and downloads after the jump.
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St-st-stutter Something Profound
This mix is about unusually attractive speech disorders.
Why It’s Pretentious: This mix is named after the album version of “Nails for Breakfast, Tacks for Snacks,” even though the demo version was clearly better. (Yeah, I just made Panic! At The Disco pretentious. You’re welcome.) I think stuttering is adorable and — along with handclaps, toy pianos, and crinkly lo-fi tape hiss — it’s one of my biggest weaknesses in songs. This mix contains some of my favorite stuttering songs that aren’t Ludacris’ “What’s Your Fantasy?” but are the Fresh Prince’s “Boom! Shake the Room.” Party tracks, y’all.
Tracklisting, downloads, and bonus song after the jump.
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String Theory
This mix is about your favorite song, but better.
Why it’s Pretentious: Look, if you’re gonna be pretentious, you better have a lot of alternate versions of songs lying around. You better collect unreleased Smiths demos and bootlegs. You better yell “when you kiss me— I sing it back” when you’re listening to “Sweetness” by Jimmy Eat World and change the entire ending of ”Round Here” by the Counting Crows during your weekly ironic karaoke. You better refer to “Mathletics” as “Neu Funk Aum,” a double whammy since Foals didn’t even release either version on a full-length. Takin’ things to the next level, you know? Anyway, this is a mix of songs that sound better than their actual releases. Respect.
Tracklisting and downloads after the jump.
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Hiding the Bushes (The Intense Bike Ride Mix)
This mix is about loving someone so much that you just have to follow them around everywhere.
Why It’s Pretentious: I like the mixes I post to relate to my life. This mix is about stalking someone. That was a funny joke because although the sentences although appear to be related, the second sentence was actually a non-sequitur. Those are my favorite kinds of jokes. I’m talking about jokes to hide the fact that this mix is actually from middle school, even though it’ll be obvious once you get to the Taking Back Sunday. Tomorrow I’m gonna be posting the mix I made for the Summer Mix Exchange Club Open To All No Girls Allowed!!!!, so just average them out, yeah?
Tracklisting and downloads after the jump.
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See Emily Play (If You Close Your Eyes…)
This mix is about oh shit my boyfriend is gay.
Why It’s Pretentious: Every week, I think to myself, “Is it time? Or will this just seem like I’m whoring out my gays for tumblr points?” Well, now that I have no dignity, LET THE GAY BEGIN. This is a true life real story about this girl whose boyfriend turned out to like other boys, which scandalized our Midwestern high school. Because I have no respect for human decency, I turned her failed relationship into the inspiration for my annual Valentine’s Day mix (but only made a few copies, of course). Much like her musical theatre boyfriend, it’s not very subtle, since every artist is, if not a flaming homosexual, then sexually questionable at the very least. Except maybe Nancy Sinatra.
Maybe.
Download: Right-click, save as.
Tracklisting and more downloads after the jump.
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